i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
i think im in europe. pls send help
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Randomize
