it was like his penis was on wheels.
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
OMG the post office opened my dildo! "we sincerely regret the damage to your package"
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
So here I am, sexting at work.
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
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