I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
Welcome to drunk texts. Live from Margaritaville, it's Saturday night!!!
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
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