i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
Hey, don't blame me for the shitty evening; I wasn't the one who promised hookers, Dos Equis and foster kittens. Keith was.
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
Randomize