I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
So, apparently I made everyone omelets last night. Even when I'm drunk, I'm still a trophy wife.
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
Randomize