but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
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