I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
Im at a strip club, and the dancer just farted into my face. The bad part about that is I could taste the wings I bought her earlier
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
Randomize
