have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
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