They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
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Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
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I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
Randomize