sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
Randomize
