just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
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