She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
The dick lei will go down in squad history
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
Nothing like sitting at your midterm pissed at yourself because you put your graphing calculator batteries in your vibrator and forgot to put them back in before the exam 😑
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
Randomize
