The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
Randomize
