how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
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