I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
Randomize
