went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
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