TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
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