Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
Randomize
