ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
He left a fire sauce packet from taco bell that said "promise you'll text me in the morning" on my nightstand.
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
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