I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
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