That's when you crack a 10am beer
if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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