i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
My cleaning lady broke my bubbler. It's awkward between us now.
Why?
Because she knows I do drugs and I know she's a clumsy bitch.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
Randomize
