I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
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