i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
This morning I woke up in the entrance of a retirement home. Memory fragments from last night: making it rain with the contents of my wallet over the bridge, getting hit by a car, and a lot of running.
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
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