What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
Tonight's Jeopardy categories were "Star Trek, Action Figures, Dinner For One, In Need of a Date, Still Living With Mom & Dad, You Have No Life." Beginning to think my life is the Truman Show.
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize
