He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
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Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
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It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
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