have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
It was confusing and full of hummus
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize
