you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
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