Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
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