Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
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