Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
Who would have guessed that ordering a vodka lemonade at Roscoe's was code for I want a hand job
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
You've got to be fucking kidding me. Do you think "Husband drunkenly pees all over floors" is reasonable grounds for divorce? So pissed off right now.
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
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