Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
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