It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
I'll pick you up. Avoid slightly awkward no-we're-not-dating-but-I'm-still-screwing-your-son-after-2-years parental run-ins.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
Randomize
