I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
Randomize
