And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
Randomize