After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
Also, my phone suggested the phrase “puke in the mailbox" how many times have I had the need to text that to people?
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
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