She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
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