I wanna get so fucked up that I try to catch a coyote in a pillowcase, breakdance fight a lion, and send back some toast at Denny's when I see its slightly burnt.
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
Randomize
