It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
So i just got diagnosed with swine flu. im at walgreens looking like shit and this guy keeps staring at me. Im so gonna cough in his face.
well, dont
I didnt. i just coughed then looked at him menacingly. he got it.
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
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