The first thing on our $10,000 damage bill was "condoms in the main drain"
You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
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