my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
I'm sorry I kept calling last night when you wouldn't pick up. I'm REALLY sorry I sang "You Oughta Know" on more than 4 voice mails.
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
Randomize