Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
Randomize
