the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
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