no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
You took a bar mat shot.
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
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