Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
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