Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
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