I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
I stole a fireplace last night.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
Randomize
