My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
Randomize
