dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
Randomize
