I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
Randomize
