well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
I need a new best friend. Someone who drinks like a fish, hooks up enough to raise eyebrows, and isn't afraid to admit that masturbation is the second best way to spend time. Someone like me! Help me put up posters.
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
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